Heidi is the proprietor of a bar in  Detroit . She realizes that virtually all of her customers are unemployed alcoholics and, as such, can no longer afford to patronize her bar. To solve this problem, she comes up with a new marketing plan that allows her customers to drink now, but pay later.

Heidi keeps track of the drinks consumed on a ledger (thereby granting the customers’ loans). Word gets around about Heidi’s “drink now, pay later” marketing strategy and, as a result, increasing numbers of customers flood into Heidi’s bar. Soon she has the largest sales volume for any bar in  Detroit .

By providing her customers freedom from immediate payment demands, Heidi gets no resistance when, at regular intervals, she substantially increases her prices for wine and beer, the most consumed beverages. Consequently, Heidi’s gross sales volume increases massively.

A young and dynamic vice-president at the local bank recognizes that these customer debts constitute valuable future assets and increases Heidi’s borrowing limit. He sees no reason for any undue concern, since he has the debts of the unemployed alcoholics as collateral.

At the bank’s corporate headquarters, expert traders figure a way to make huge commissions, and transform these customer loans into DRINKBONDS, ALKIBONDS and PUKEBONDS. These securities are then bundled and traded on international security markets.

Naive investors don’t really understand that the securities being sold to them as AAA secured bonds are really the debts of unemployed alcoholics. Nevertheless, the bond prices continuously climb, and the securities soon become the hottest-selling items for some of the nation’s leading brokerage houses.

One day, even though the bond prices are still climbing, a risk manager at the original local bank decides that the time has come to demand payment on the debts incurred by the drinkers at Heidi’s bar. He so informs Heidi.
Heidi then demands payment from her alcoholic patrons, but being unemployed alcoholics they cannot pay back their drinking debts. Since Heidi cannot fulfill her loan obligations she is forced into bankruptcy. The bar closes and the eleven employees lose their jobs.

Overnight, DRINKBONDS, ALKIBONDS and PUKEBONDS drop in price by 90%. The collapsed bond asset value destroys the banks liquidity and prevents it from issuing new loans, thus freezing credit and economic activity in the community.The suppliers of Heidi’s bar had granted her generous payment extensions and had invested their firms’ pension funds in the various BOND securities. They find they are now faced with having to write off her bad debt and with losing over 90% of the presumed value of the bonds. Her wine supplier also claims bankruptcy, closing the doors on a family business that had endured for three generations, her beer supplier is taken over by a competitor, who immediately closes the local plant and lays off 150 workers.

Fortunately though, the bank, the brokerage houses and their respective executives are saved and bailed out by a multi-billion dollar no-strings attached cash infusion from their cronies in Government. The funds required for this bailout are obtained by new taxes levied on employed, middle-class, non-drinkers who have never been in Heidi’s bar.

Now do you understand?

Reminder: Libertarians can’t vote in Republican and Democrat Primaries.

I just want to send out a quick reminder to all Libertarians that you can’t vote in the Republican and Democrat Primary elections if you are interested in voting in the Libertarian Conventions.

On March 9th, the Precinct Conventions will be held at 7:00PM.  The smallest political unit in Texas is the Voting Precinct.  Our goal is to have one Libertarian Precinct Chair in each Voting Precinct.  Precinct Chairs are responsible for distributing door hangers, meeting their neighbors, and getting out the Libertarian vote on Election Day.  Contact your County Chair or Executive Director Robert Butler if you wish to be a Precinct Chair.  The most important duty at the Precinct Convention is to nominate delegates to the County Convention.

On March 13th, the County Conventions will be held at a time and place determined by your local chair.  County parties are the local affiliates of the Libertarian Party of Texas.  Most electoral action occurs at the county or city level, so it is vitally important for the Libertarian Party to have active county organizations and volunteers.  We encourage you to speak with your local leaders and attend local meetings.  This is usually the best way to get involved and find out where your help can make the most difference.  We need active County Chairs and Officers to promote the Libertarian Party, get candidates on the ballot, and address local issues.  The most important duties of the county conventions include: 1) nominating candidates for public office  2) Selecting delegates to the District and State Conventions  3) Electing county party officers  4) Adopting or Amending county party bylaws

On March 20th, the District Conventions will be held at a time and place planned by the active county chairs within the Districts.  At the District Conventions, candidates are nominated for public offices whose boundries cross county lines, such as State Representatives, State Board of Education, and State Senators.

On May 28th – 30th, the Libertarian National Convention will be held in St. Louis, Missouri.  For more information, please visit http://www.gatewaytoliberty.com/

On June 11th – 13th, the Libertarian Party of Texas will hold its State Convention at the Radisson North Hotel in Austin, Texas.  We will nominate our candidates for Governor and other statewide races.  We will also have a number of interesting Libertarian speakers, and conduct educational workshops on how to move public policy in a Libertarian direction by lobbying public officials and electing fellow Libertarians.

If you are interested in voting in any of these conventions, please remember that you can not vote in the Republican or Democrat Primaries.  According to Texas law, you are declaring yourself to be a Republican or a Democrat for all of calendar year 2010 when you vote in their primary.  If you are a partisan Libertarian candidate for public office in November, you will be disqualifed by the Secretary of State if you vote in another party’s primary.

You can find out where to attend a Precinct, County, or State Convention by contacting your County Chair.  Click Here for a current list of County Chairs.  If your county is not organized, you can call Robert Butler at (512) 291-6671 or email director@lptexas.org to find out how you can organize or represent your county.

We actually received a call last week from the 809 area code. The woman said ‘Hey, this is Karen. Sorry I missed you–get back to us quickly. I have something important to tell you.’ Then she repeated a phone n umber beginning with 809.   We didn’t respond.. 

Then this week, we received the following e-mail:

Do Not DIAL AREA CODE
809, 284, and 876

THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT INFORMATION PROVIDED TO US BY AT&T.

 This one is being distributed all over the US. This is pretty scary, especially given the way they try to get you to call. 

Be sure you read this and pass it on. 

They get you to call by telling you that it is information about a family member who has been ill or to tell you someone has been arrested, died, or to let you know you have won a wonderful prize, etc. In each case, you are told to call the 809 number right away. Since there are so many new area codes these days, people unknowingly return these calls.

If you call from the U.S., you will apparently be charged $2425 per-minute.

Or, you’ll get a long recorded message. The point is, they will try to keep you on the phone as long as possible to increase the charges.

WHY IT WORKS:
The 809  area code is located in the Dominican Republic. The charges afterward can become a real nightmare. That’s because you did actually make the call.  If you complain, both your local phone company and your long distance carrier will not want to get involved and will most likely tell you that they are simply providing the billing for the foreign company. You’ll end up dealing with a foreign company that argues they have done nothing wrong. 

Please forward this entire message to your friends, family and colleagues to help them become aware of this scam.

AT&T VERIFIES IT’S TRUE: 
http://www.att.com/gen/press-room?pid=6045
SNOPES VERIFIES IT’S TRUE:
 http://www.snopes.com/fraud/telephone/809.asp

DINOSAURS!!!